20-ish guy: I looked over at Sharon and didn’t think she had any bottoms on. Then a wave lifted up her stomach, and I saw that she did. –Old Lyme, Connecticut Overheard by: Ann
Hot girl to friend: No, no, my underwear comes home with me every time; my panties will be no one's trophy. –Target, Huntington Beach, California Overheard by: Candace
Underage girl: Oh, my God. Look at that guy. He’s so fucking hot.
Bartender, sarcastically: Oooh, nice. Maybe if you show him your boobs, he’ll buy you a drink?
Underage girl: You think so?
Mom: No way. You’re as flat as a surfboard. If you want that guy to buy you a drink, you’d have to do a lot more than show him your boobs. –The Seafood Bar, The Breakers, Palm Beach, Florida Overheard by: The JAP
Furious teenage boy to other teens: Just because you call “no-homo” before you do something doesn't mean it's not gay! –Coney Island, New York
White trash mother to crying infant: Would you stop being such an asshole? Jesus, you’re just a selfish bastard like your father. –Scarborough Beach, Rhode Island Overheard by: girl in bikini pretending to read
Little sister: Bury me! Bury me!
Big brother: No, I can’t marry you. That’d be disgusting.
Little sister: BURY me!
Big brother: No, no, I can’t marry you! Stop it!
Little sister: I said BURY me, stupid! –Orchard Beach, New York Overheard by: Anais Borg-Marks
Vendor: Hey, buy some pizza!
Chick: I don’t like bread.
Vendor: Then just eat the cheese!
Chick: I’m lactose-intolerant.
Vendor: Fro-zen yo-gurt! –Venice Beach, California
Drunk girl pointing at pelican: Holy shit — a fuckin’ Pterodactyl! –Cancun, Mexico
Blonde, very loudly: You know, if I was a guy, these bikini bottoms would really cut into my balls! –Key West, Florida Overheard by: Anne
Girl, carrying piece of kelp to dad: This can be my pet until we get a doggie! –Hermosa Beach, California