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Hey, I'm Not Giving Up My Good-Luck Marmoset
Stoned surfer #1: Sharks never attack people unless you, like, swim around with a bloody, severed leg tied around your neck.
Stoned surfer #2: Yeah, or like a severed arm or a dead monkey or something.
--Bolinas, California
Every Drug Needs Evangelists
Girl running along shore: Smoke weed every day!
Black lady on beach blanket: Hallelujah! Come here, baby!
Girl runs to black lady, who stands and hugs her and kisses her.
Black lady: Smoke weed, God bless you!
--Seaside Heights, New Jersey
Overheard by: t-money
Travis Decides to Abandon Vanilla
Tiny mullet kid: Spank the hiney! Spank the hiney!
Surfer passerby: Spank the hiney? Awesome!
--Robert Moses Beach, New York
Drugs Create the Illusion You Have Something to Say
Stoned chick: So, whenever I'm stoned, like this stoned, I start a sentence... And then through half the sentence, I finish another sentence I said before, or finish another idea in my head, or just start talking. It's like I forget or something, like, my idea, and it's like I had it all there, and stuff. You know what I mean?
Stoned guy: ... That's retarded.
--St. Petersburg, Florida
