Girl to surfer boy: If your dick is big as this ice cream I'll throw the ice cream in the trash and lick your dick! –Santa Monica, California
Five-year-old girl looking at dead jellyfish: I wonder what flavor jelly it likes… –Atlantic City, New Jersey Overheard by: jared
Queer #1: Oh my god, I used to eat Little Debbies all the time! I would have a Little Debbie and a Coke for breakfast every day.
Queer #2, intensely: I fucking loved Little Debbies. –Publix, South Beach, Miami, Florida
Girl to brother: What are you eating?
Brother: Human remains. –Tampa, Florida
Queer #1, holding apple core: Is this biodegradable?
Queer #2, driving: Yes!
Queer #1: Okay! (tosses it out the window) –Sandy Hook, New Jersey
Mother to screaming child throwing sachets of sugar: Do that again and you won't get a babycino. –Café, Bondi Beach, Australia Overheard by: GGary
Stoned nerd (talking about his sub order): I've got six inches!
Stoned girl: Lucky. I got the lesbian choice, a fuckin' sandwich. Cuz the sandwich is like a vagina and the sub is like a dick, ya know?
Stoned nerd: No, I totally understand. And I'm okay with that. –Wawa, Rehoboth Beach, Delaware
Little girl, crying: He’s not coming! He said he was going to come, and now he’s not coming!
Apathetic, topless, overly-tan mom: Go home. Eat something. –Palavas-les-Flots, France (translated from French) Overheard by: Christine
Thin girl ordering funnel cake: I want so much powdered sugar on it that I don't want to be able to see the dough! –Ocean City, Maryland