Hot girl to friend: No, no, my underwear comes home with me every time; my panties will be no one's trophy. –Target, Huntington Beach, California Overheard by: Candace
Underage girl: Oh, my God. Look at that guy. He’s so fucking hot.
Bartender, sarcastically: Oooh, nice. Maybe if you show him your boobs, he’ll buy you a drink?
Underage girl: You think so?
Mom: No way. You’re as flat as a surfboard. If you want that guy to buy you a drink, you’d have to do a lot more than show him your boobs. –The Seafood Bar, The Breakers, Palm Beach, Florida Overheard by: The JAP
Little sister: Bury me! Bury me!
Big brother: No, I can’t marry you. That’d be disgusting.
Little sister: BURY me!
Big brother: No, no, I can’t marry you! Stop it!
Little sister: I said BURY me, stupid! –Orchard Beach, New York Overheard by: Anais Borg-Marks
Vendor: Hey, buy some pizza!
Chick: I don’t like bread.
Vendor: Then just eat the cheese!
Chick: I’m lactose-intolerant.
Vendor: Fro-zen yo-gurt! –Venice Beach, California
Girl, carrying piece of kelp to dad: This can be my pet until we get a doggie! –Hermosa Beach, California
Teenage girl #1: To make a long story short, she was pretty pissed that they removed the wrong one.
Teenage girl #2: Yeah… But either way it was probably an improvement. –Huntington Beach, California
Ghetto girl: …And so I broke up with him because he kept getting robbed. He had all these shady friends, ya know? It was like we’d wake up and the television and the shower curtain would be gone. –Misquamicut Beach, Rhode Island
Chick, passing another reading Brave New World: That girl was reading a book about Columbus, I think. –East Matunuck State Beach, Rhode Island Overheard by: it's got a Savage, but no Columbus
Dirty old man to visibly terrified 20-something girl next to him: You know, as of today I am no longer on probation. Yep. You look good in shorts. I'm wearing pants cause I had to go to court today. (stops to make phone call) Hey, it's Steven*! Not on probation anymore! (hangs up without saying goodbye, turns back to girl) Right over there is where I went to school. Ten years old, then I quit. Mom used to have a dry clean right over there. No more. Ya know, over that building's the one my buddy sold and now it's a Hard Rock Cafe. A Hard Rock Cafe! Some years ago I saw Peter, Paul & Mary there. Ya know them? I used to date Mary. Wanted me to go to [unintelligible] with her. Never been there to this day. Been to South America, Africa, all over! Never done go to [unintelligible]. Alright, well, take care! (he gets off bus)
No longer terrified 20-something girl to random girl: He smelled like cocaine! –Express Bus, Waikiki, Hawaii Overheard by: mel
Trashy looking blonde, as two girls walk into a party: Ew, why are there smart people here? –Manhattan Beach, California Overheard by: smart people