Tourist mom to kids, upon seeing dolphins: Get out of the water! Go, now! Get out! [After seeing everyone else getting in and swimming out.] Never mind, get back in. –Treasure Island, Florida Overheard by: Native Floridian
Tourist lady #1: Do you think the melon is any good? Should I give it to the kids?
Tourist man: Why? What’s wrong with it?
Tourist lady #1: It was on the counter earlier for an hour or so.
Tourist lady #2: Oh, no, I’d ask someone else.
Tourist lady #1, loudly, to others in group: Do you think the melon is any good? I’m not sure I should give it to the kids.
Group members: Why? I don’t know if you should! Do the kids like melon? Was it warm when it was out?
Male stranger in line: Are you retahded?! Just give them the fuckin’ melon! –Crane Beach, Ipswich, Massachusetts Overheard by: Buhaj
Lifeguard to wading mother: That girl is too small. She can't be out that far. She has to be within arm's length.
Mother: How far is arm's length? –Jericho Beach, Vancouver, Canadia Overheard by: hefferlump
Mom (exasperatedly): Come on children, you guys going to give me heart failure!
Six-year-old: You going to give yourself heart failure, cause you wouldn't leave us alone. –Bridgetown, Barbados
Mom to son as he runs off to play: Don’t touch the sand! Don’t touch the sand! –Long Beach, New York Overheard by: Jawdropped
Mom: Honey, what are you doing?
Daughter: Going under the umbrella, because I don’t want my butt to get parched. –Jones Beach, New York Overheard by: Kara
Irritated mother: So, the dance is really just a DJ playing music for an hour, it's very informal.
Blonde teen: So, does that mean it's unformal? –Huntington Beach, California Overheard by: hahahahaha
Teenage girl in expensive yoga pants to meek mother: Move to France? Why the hell would I move to France? That's the dumbest thing I've heard you say in, like, forever. Stop trying to live your, like, stupid dreams and stuff through me! –Coffee Shop in the Beach, Toronto, Canadia
Whiny little boy: Mo-ooom, it’s hot!
Mom: Stop that! Whining makes you hot. –Isle of Palms, South Carolina Overheard by: Laura and John
Underage girl: Oh, my God. Look at that guy. He’s so fucking hot.
Bartender, sarcastically: Oooh, nice. Maybe if you show him your boobs, he’ll buy you a drink?
Underage girl: You think so?
Mom: No way. You’re as flat as a surfboard. If you want that guy to buy you a drink, you’d have to do a lot more than show him your boobs. –The Seafood Bar, The Breakers, Palm Beach, Florida Overheard by: The JAP