Teen bimbette: So I heard about this new band that just came out. The lead singer is really cute… they’re called The Doors. –South California
Irritated mother: So, the dance is really just a DJ playing music for an hour, it's very informal.
Blonde teen: So, does that mean it's unformal? –Huntington Beach, California Overheard by: hahahahaha
Dirty old man to visibly terrified 20-something girl next to him: You know, as of today I am no longer on probation. Yep. You look good in shorts. I'm wearing pants cause I had to go to court today. (stops to make phone call) Hey, it's Steven*! Not on probation anymore! (hangs up without saying goodbye, turns back to girl) Right over there is where I went to school. Ten years old, then I quit. Mom used to have a dry clean right over there. No more. Ya know, over that building's the one my buddy sold and now it's a Hard Rock Cafe. A Hard Rock Cafe! Some years ago I saw Peter, Paul & Mary there. Ya know them? I used to date Mary. Wanted me to go to [unintelligible] with her. Never been there to this day. Been to South America, Africa, all over! Never done go to [unintelligible]. Alright, well, take care! (he gets off bus)
No longer terrified 20-something girl to random girl: He smelled like cocaine! –Express Bus, Waikiki, Hawaii Overheard by: mel
Little girl: Mommy, where’s the rest of your bathing suit?
Mother: It’s called a ‘thong,’ honey.
Little girl: Like that song?
Mother: Yes, honey, just like the song. Little girl hums ‘Thong Song.’ –West Palm Beach, Florida
Mother to father: Oh my! Jerry, say something to that old man. His testicles are hanging out of his swimsuit.
Little girl: I have testicles. They’re in my mouth. [Opens mouth]
Mother: Not tonsils. Testicles!
Father: Seven, and already MTV has ruined her. –Virginia Beach, Virginia Overheard by: Book Reading Beach Bum
Guy: I don't understand that song. I mean, how can hips not lie? That's like saying, “my nipples don't argue.”
Friend: Well, my cock never complains. –Sandy Hook, New Jersey Overheard by: raerae
Tan guy jogger listening to iPod, shouting: Happy birthday!
Fit lady jogger listening to iPod, shouting: Thanks! –Bondi Beach, Australia Overheard by: GGary
Amateur musicologist: Paul McCartney had a band before Wings? –Phoenix, Arizona
20-Something girl #1: Yeah, I fell asleep. It was a stupid movie! And that guy with the squid on his face, who was he, Medusa?
20-Something girl #2: You mean Davy Jones?
20-Something girl #1: Yeah. And I was like, what about The Monkees?
20-Something girl #2: There weren’t any monkeys.
20-Something girl #1: You’re too young to remember the Sixties. Davy Jones was in the Monkees.
20-Something girl #2: Um, Davy Jones the pirate came first. Haven’t you ever heard of Davy Jones’s locker?
20-Something girl #1: I have absolutely no idea what you’re talking about. –Craigville Beach, Cape Cod, Massachusetts
Chick #1: I think I need glasses or something, I can't even read the name of this song.
Chick #2: That's because your iPod is so scratched up.
Chick #1: Oh. –Ashwaubomay Park Beach, Green Bay, Wisconsin Overheard by: Melanie