Chick: Fuck, I stepped on a piece of glass!
Dude: Was it beach glass?
Chick: I don’t know… We’re at the beach… Probably.
–Santa Monica, California
Overheard by: monkey
Archive for the ‘Questions’ Category
Kids, Can You Find Five Things Wrong with this Sunbather?
Girl #1: How do my boobs look?
Girl #2: Like oranges. Seriously, you need to quit that fake tanning shit.
Girl #1: Suck my dick.
–Ocean City, Maryland
No, We're Practicing Civil Disobedience
Brainiac: Are you allowed to skinny dip here?
–Nude beach, Sandy Hook, New Jersey
You Mean While You Were Out Spreading Herpes?
Girl to friend in hot-pants: What have you been doing besides looking fat in those shorts all day?
–Lake Michigan
It's All Gone Downhill Since the Tooth Fairy Started Subcontracting
Lifeguard: What happened to your toenail?
Little boy: A monster carried it off a while ago. Around kindergarten, I think.
–Long Beach, California
Overheard by: Super Sexy Woman
Wait, I Just Saw You Buy a Lemonade With a 10… Bend Over
Clothed guy: Hey, got any change?
Nude guy, waving his hands in the air: I got no pockets!
–Wreck Beach, British Columbia, Canadia
Believe Me, They Don't Want to Talk to You
Girl: What’s the number for 411? –Sag Main, Sagaponack, New York Overheard by: Friend on the Beach
No, 'Take It Off,' by The Donnas
Little girl: Mommy, where’s the rest of your bathing suit?
Mother: It’s called a ‘thong,’ honey.
Little girl: Like that song?
Mother: Yes, honey, just like the song.
Little girl hums ‘Thong Song.’
–West Palm Beach, Florida
No, No, I Think Paranoid Jealousy is the Appropriate Reaction
Girl #1: But then I thought, ‘Why the hell would he kiss her when he has me?’
Girl #2: Uh, because of the herpes?
Girl #1: Fuck you.
–Cape May, New Jersey
Overheard by: J.Tro
He'll Find Out about It Online Eventually
Drunk mother #1: I met him at a bar. He looked like George Clooney… But we’ll see.
Drunk mother #2: Wait, aren’t you dating someone?
Drunk mother #1: Not anymore. He just doesn’t know it yet.
–Daytona Beach, Florida