Archive for the ‘Questions’ Category

And Prince

Aunt, looking up at the stars: What is that?
Nephew: Is this the southern or northern hemisphere?
Aunt (giggling): I have no idea.
Cousin, without looking up : That's Orion. You can see Meissa, the star at the top, that's its head. The really bright one is Rigel, that's supposed to be the knee. If you follow the constellation downwards you'll see Sirius.
(blank dumbfounded looks)
Cousin: That's, um, where the aliens from V come from.
Aunt, completely understanding : Ohhhh! –Beaches of Koh Sumet, Thailand

If Only There Was a Way We Could Both Get What We Want

Woman #1: Now you see that dude right there? That one in the green swim trunks.
Woman #2: Okaaaaay, yeah, I see him. The one with the red hair that's skimboarding?
Woman #1: Yeah, him. Now, I would so hook up with him. Look at those abs. Don't you just wanna run your hands all over him?
Girl slathered in tanning oil, staring at them: That's my boyfriend.
Woman #2: Oh. How long have you guys been going out?
Girl: Four months. What's it to you?
Woman #1: Just weighing our chances.
Girl: Chances of what?
Woman #2: Sleeping with him.
(girl makes disgusted noise and walks away).
Woman #2: Don' t worry, Shar. She's hideous. We'll follow them when they leave and the next time they go to a club or something, we'll hunt him down and get what we want.
Woman #1: We always do. Wait…which one of us gets to sleep with him? (they glance at each other, saying nothing) I've got a bigger rack. –Pismo Beach, California Overheard by: Matilda