Archive for the ‘Race’ Category

In the Same Way That Televangelists Heal

Little boy: Mom, Jewish people are from the desert, right?
Mom: Yeah.
Little boy: So why are they in Miami?
Mom: The beach is like a desert — with water, though.
Little boy: Oh. What about black people?
Mom: Sweetie, they’re just tan. They’re all just tan. Now go play. [pause] It’s like I’m healing the world. –Miami, Florida

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They're Trying to Imagine a Black Dude, Obviously

Queer #1: Charles, look, there’s another one. He’s white, and the other looks Asian. Holds up large signs that say “6” and “4,” respectively. Queer #2: Definitely!
Queer #1: Oh, wow. Look at this one. Latino. Yummmm! Holds up sign that says “9.” Queer #2: Oh, yes. Totally!
Straight girl, walking by: What are you two doing? Comparing guys’ looks?
Queer #1: Uhh…
Queer #2: Breeder, please. The Asian guy is a 4, the white guy is a 6, and the Latino guy a 9. What do you think we’re trying to imagine? –Sunset Beach, Florida Overheard by: MangoJoe

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So God Does Play Dice With the Universe!

Girl: He gets so tan!
Guy: I tell you, you look at his hand and you’d think that man was black!
Girl: You know, his mom’s husband is black. That’s why we tease him about that so much.
Guy: Really? His step-dad is black?
Girl: Yeah.
Guy: Wouldn’t you be pissed?
Girl: Yeah, well, his mom treats him like shit anyway. Brief pause. Girl: I’m rethinking the doctor thing.
Guy: Really?
Girl: Yeah, surgeon or oncologist or whatever I become. I wouldn’t be able to have a family. –Rehoboth, Delaware Overheard by: kristen

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