Rich lady with yappy dog: Well, ‘Caucasian’ has ‘Asian’ in it. Then again, there’s a ‘turd’ in every ‘Saturday.’ –Golden Gardens Park, Seattle, Washington Overheard by: Disturbed
Archive for the ‘Washington’ Category
Or "Horseshoe Crabs Aren't Fuckbuddies"
Girl to friend: Swimming without lifeguards is awesome. There's nobody to say, “hey, no splash fights”, or “you can't have that fifth of vodka in the water!”
–Madison Beach, Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: Also Drinking
Your What?
Woman standing waist-deep in water: My labia has atrophied.
–Crescent Lake, Washington
Overheard by: The water really was that cold.
Gonna Be Everybody's Naptime
Hipster teen on cell: No, dude, I'm not sober. I'm totally drunk and I have to babysit in less than an hour!
–Alki Beach, Seattle, Washington
…I'm Sally, by the Way.
Girl to boy: Look at the sea otters! So romantic! …touch my breasts.
–Tacoma, Washington
Oh! Lance, You're….Not What I'd Been Led To Expect
Girl #1: Does Lance have a big peepee?
Girl #2: Yes, all the girls in town know! Ask his ex Barb.
–Kirkland, Washington
Overheard by: mike hunt
Oh, Right, the Money and the 10-inch Cock
Chick on cell: Yeah, don’t you wash your hands after you go to the bathroom? Ewww, why am I dating you?
–Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: hannie bananie
But You Had a Kid, Mary!
Bitchy friend: … So then we took a vote, and you’re the biggest slut out of all of us.
Girl: But I’m the only virgin.
Bitchy friend: We know.
–Kingston Beach, Washington
I Concur! Can You Fathom or Even Credit His Total Aphasia?
Teen #1: So he’s like, "nuh uh," and I’m like, "uh huh," and he’s like, "nuh uh," and I’m like, "um… uh huh," and he’s like, "nuh uh."
Teen #2: No way!
Teen #1: Way.
–Golden Gardens, Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: Translater Please!
In Paradise the Garbage Men Will Have Doctorates
30-Something business dude: I’ve traveled a lot, man, and I’ve been to Costa Rica, and there are no Indians there. Like, people are educated, and there are people with Master’s degrees driving taxi cabs and stuff!
–Golden Gardens, Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: Be-deez nuts