Rich lady with yappy dog: Well, ‘Caucasian’ has ‘Asian’ in it. Then again, there’s a ‘turd’ in every ‘Saturday.’ –Golden Gardens Park, Seattle, Washington Overheard by: Disturbed
Little girl: Mommy, where’s the rest of your bathing suit?
Mother: It’s called a ‘thong,’ honey.
Little girl: Like that song?
Mother: Yes, honey, just like the song. Little girl hums ‘Thong Song.’ –West Palm Beach, Florida
Girl on cell: Hey! I'm having a barbecue tonight! You should totally come over to my place and drink juice. And by “juice,” I mean sooodaaaa.
–Virginia Beach, Virginia
Girl #1: We need shade. I don't want to get burned.
Girl #2: Wha'd she say?
Girl #3: She says she's gonna be a little bitch.
–Playa Mia, Mexico
Overheard by: Peeto
Drunk boy: Anemic? Isn't that when you eat too much white bread?
–Poolside, Perth, Australia
American female tourist #1: So what did you say your favorite condoment was ?
American female tourist #2: Trojans!
American male tourist: You kiddin … Mine is Europe, every time!
–Holland America Cruise, Mediterrean Sea
Overheard by: Vennfix
Young 20-something guy, while texting: Is tranny spelled with one “n” or two?
–Ferry, Fire Island, New York
Little boy: Dad, what's the navy?
Dad: It's the army, but with boats.
–South Haven, Michigan
Girl to boy showing a picture: This is for Valentine's Day.
Boy: Umm… That's really disturbing, is it a bouquet of penises?
Girl: It's not disturbing! It's for Valentine's. (pause) Wait, did you just say “penises”?
Father to daughter, while mother brushes hair: Doesn't that hurt?
Daughter: Nope, I have a strong scallop.
Father: What does that mean? Your head is not made of vegetables!
Mother: What? Vegetables? That's “scallions,” you idiot! And your head is not a scallop, it's a scalp… you're both idiots! (laughs hysterically)
–Robert Moses, Long Island, New York
Overheard by: Sugardoll