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Wanna Buy a Bloody Knife?
Little boy: My daddy isn't here.
Girl #1: He isn't here? Where is he?
Little boy: In the garbage.
Girl #2: Why is he in the garbage?
Little boy: He is in the garbage.
Girl #1: Why?
Little boy: Because he doesn't like my Skechers.
--Cocoa Beach, Florida
Overheard by: megan
Dolphin: I Prefer Cetecean-Australian, Thanks
Dude: When I was in Florida, there was a dolphin in the water about five feet from me. I never ran so fast in my life.
Chick: Why?
Dude: When something big and black surfaces next to you in the water, you generally start to shit your pants.
--North Burleigh Beach, Australia
Overheard by: Galina
I Clearly Haven't Properly Instilled in You the Virtues of Reverse Cowgirl
Girl #1: Did you hear we're getting the lockers on the bottom row at school next year?
Girl #2: Oh, really? I hope I get someone hot on top of me.
Mother, just tuning in to conversation: What?!
--Williamstown Beach, Melbourne, Australia
Overheard by: knee coal
Or Even If He Didn't
JAP #1: Okay, seriously, he is the hottest senior ever.
JAP #2: Hah, yeah he is.
JAP #1: Like, you don't understand -- I would fuck his toe if he asked me to.
--Boca Beach Club, Boca Raton, Florida
Overheard by: lilly
No, They Fly It in for Pictures
Wet swimmer staring at recently caught shark: Did you catch that here?
--Tybee Island Pier, Savannah, Georgia
Overheard by: Shane
Not Our Sort at All
Preppy guy #1: God, this place totally sucks.
Preppy guy #2: No, it's fine. You just need to embrace your inner boat person.
Preppy guy #1: Jeffy, I think these are motor boat people.
--Myrtle Beach, South Carolina
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