Reminds Me of That Time I Had That Tommy Lee Dream

Housemate: So, last night I was so high on acid that I thought the whole beach was made of cocaine, and now I can't breathe.

--Brazil

Overheard by: living with morons

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Posted 2007-05-12 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us |  Facebook

We Just Need to Figure Out a Way to Get Government Funding

Biker to biker babe: We could hide a homeless guy between your boobs and he could eat forever.

--Holiday Inn, New Smyrna Beach, Florida

Overheard by: Beeeej

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Posted 2007-05-11 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us |  Facebook

That's Why Jim Beam Has Been on My Training Table for Years

Spring break girl #1, holding cereal: I think I'll have this for breakfast.
Spring break girl #2: I'm having alcohol for breakfast.
Spring break girl #1, putting cereal back: Oooh, good idea!

--Panama City Beach, Florida

Overheard by: Lsquared

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Posted 2007-05-10 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us |  Facebook

He Said He Would Love Her Always

Guy #1: No. She, like, threw the tampon.
Guy #2: At him?
Guy #1: Yeah, to turn him on.

--St. Augustine, Florida

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Posted 2007-05-09 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us |  Facebook

Is She Full of Antioxidants?

Little boy pointing to black woman: Look, Mom! It's a chocolate lady!

--Myrtle Beach, South Carolina

Overheard by: Jane

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Posted 2007-05-08 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us |  Facebook

Just Say Galileo Was a Test-Tube Baby

Boy: Dad, who's more intelligent? The father or the son?
Dad: The father, of course.
Boy: Who invented the telescope?
Dad: Galileo Galilei.
Boy: Why didn't his father?

--Boracay, Philippines

Overheard by: jkcalma

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Posted 2007-05-07 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us |  Facebook

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