A Safe Projection Based on Past Performance

18-year-old girl #1: I wonder what we'll be like in college...
18-year-old girl #2: I think I'll be a slut.

--Cable Beach, Bahamas

Overheard by: Rachel

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Posted 2007-09-08 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us |  Facebook

Grown-ups Use MySpace

14-year-old skater dude rolling up to two friends hugging: I thought you two broke up... over the phone... like little bitches.

--Hermosa Beach, California

Overheard by: therigo

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Posted 2007-09-07 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us |  Facebook

... And the Losers Will Don Suicide Belts

Bimbette announcer during Miss Hampton Beach pageant: ... And now our auditor will talibate the results...

--Hampton Beach, New Hampshire

Overheard by: Annette

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Posted 2007-09-06 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us |  Facebook

People Who Know This Always Get Stuck with Those Who Deny It

Whiny little boy: Mo-ooom, it's hot!
Mom: Stop that! Whining makes you hot.

--Isle of Palms, South Carolina

Overheard by: Laura and John

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Posted 2007-09-05 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us |  Facebook

Which Is Really Making Me Sick

Concerned passerby: Dude... Are you okay?
Concerned drunk: I appreciate your concern, but you're standing in my puke.

--Myrtle Beach, South Carolina

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Posted 2007-09-04 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us |  Facebook

A Scene That Had to Be Cut from Shrek

Tan chick on towel: So, I was like, 'And what about the donkeys? Like, do they enjoy sex like we do?'
Pale fat chick next to her: I would guess so. I mean, I had a friend who sucked one off one time, so why not?

--Clearwater Beach, Florida

Overheard by: ...what?

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Posted 2007-09-03 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us |  Facebook

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