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The Premature Ejaculators' Society Takes a Holiday
Loud Brit on cell: Oh, yes! We're finally here! It's so warm here! All quiet -- it's just beautiful! Will you be along soon? Oh... Ah... Uh-huh... So you're going to have sex? Right, then -- see you in a minute! Bye!
--Barcelona, Spain
Overheard by: Avkram
Take That, Feudalism!
Four-year-old girl squatting over sand castle: Look, Mommy, I'm peeing! Look, Mommy, it's a toilet!
--Isle of Palms, South Carolina
The Tourists Would Have Fed Them, Too, and Then...
Late-20s chick #1: Don't the tourists understand the laws of seagull shitting? I mean, if they feed them, they are going to crap all over the entire beach.
Late-20s chick #2: At least the parade of Hare Krishnas has passed.
--Jacksonville Beach, Florida
Overheard by: unMuse
What Happens When You Have Aunts Who Haven't Seen You in a While
Little boy with ice cream: They gonna manhandle me!
--Virginia Beach, Virginia
Overheard by: Audrey
Another Great Time-Killer? "Pregnant or Fat?"
Daughter: Sorry I'm late.
Mom: That's okay. We were playing 'Tourist or not?' with the passersby. Look -- those two -- obviously tourists.
Daughter: Oh, kinda like when I play 'Jew or not?' when I get bored.
--Ipanema, Rio de Janeiro, Brazil
Overheard by: Jew tourist
Like, Where Do Tornados Go on Spring Break?
Kid: If a tornado comes, will our beach be destroyed?
Mom: No. Tornadoes don't come to the beach.
Kid: Why not? We're better than Kansas, and that place got leveled!
--Jacksonville Beach, Florida
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