Overheard At The Beach 2016-02-11T19:28:32Z http://www.overheardatthebeach.com/feed/atom/ WordPress beach http://beach.wpengine.com <![CDATA[That Was the Hottest Thing I've Ever Seen. I Dream about Her Every Night.]]> http://beach.wpengine.com/?p=474 2016-02-11T18:48:19Z 2016-02-11T18:48:19Z Doctor: This woman came into the ER the other day who had cut herself on the forehead, but instead of using a towel or something to stop the bleeding, she wrapped her head up like seven times with duct tape.
Dork: Holy shit! How did you get it off of her?
Doctor: We had to cut it off in little strips. She looked like a Hershey’s Kiss.
Dork: What, you mean she was black?
Doctor: Yes! –Crane Beach, Massachusetts

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beach http://beach.wpengine.com <![CDATA[She's Doing It Again]]> http://beach.wpengine.com/?p=677 2016-02-11T12:21:35Z 2016-02-11T12:21:35Z Dude #1: You know how your girlfriend does that thing with her tongue?
Dude #2: I’ve talked to her about that. –St. Augustine, Florida

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beach http://beach.wpengine.com <![CDATA[A Blonde Twin]]> http://beach.wpengine.com/?p=1063 2016-02-11T06:02:38Z 2016-02-11T06:02:38Z 40-something guy: That must be like an all-you-can-eat salad bar of STDs!
60-something guy: She’s a twin. –Pancake House, Redondo Beach, California

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beach http://beach.wpengine.com <![CDATA[Except Freckles and His Friends, Which Is Really Tired]]> http://beach.wpengine.com/?p=1684 2016-02-10T23:30:39Z 2016-02-10T23:30:39Z Girl #1: Oh wow, you got so many freckles today!
Guy: Why does everyone keep saying that? Do freckles come from the sun or something?
Girl #2: Um… yeah?
Guy: I just kinda thought they showed up. Like sometimes they're here, and sometimes they're not.
Girl #1: Um, no, it's not random. Like, I ate some cheese, so now I'm freckled.
Girl #2: Or, I'm really freckled cuz I'm tired. –Paradise Beach, Mykonos, Greece Overheard by: Jules

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beach http://beach.wpengine.com <![CDATA[You Should Start a Support Group.]]> http://beach.wpengine.com/?p=1331 2016-02-10T17:28:33Z 2016-02-10T17:28:33Z Drunk girl #1: Oh my god, now I know what you mean about hooking up on a beach.
Drunk girl #2: What?
Drunk girl #1: The sand…it gets everywhere!
Drunk girl #2: Oh yeah, it is like all in my hair and my purse.
Drunk girl #1: No… I mean *everywhere*.
Drunk girl #2: What?
(pause)
Drunk girl #1: I have sand in my vagina! –Naples, Florida

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beach http://beach.wpengine.com <![CDATA[Oh, That Ought to Narrow It Down]]> http://beach.wpengine.com/?p=752 2016-02-10T10:51:48Z 2016-02-10T10:51:48Z Druggie hipster #1 to friend out of earshot: Hey! Hey, you! Hey! Come here!
Druggie hipster #2: Ugh, what’s her name? Come here! Hey!
Black guy passerby: Hey, white bitch! –Coney Island, New York Overheard by: Audra

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beach http://beach.wpengine.com <![CDATA[Eh, You Don't Know Squat.]]> http://beach.wpengine.com/?p=1639 2016-02-10T04:49:19Z 2016-02-10T04:49:19Z Guy to Dachshund: Sit!
Girl: He doesn't really need to sit, he is so close to the ground. –Tampa, Florida

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beach http://beach.wpengine.com <![CDATA[I'll Only Kiss You in Public Restrooms and Camera-Free Elevators]]> http://beach.wpengine.com/?p=921 2016-02-09T22:21:25Z 2016-02-09T22:21:25Z Chick #1: Why didn’t you kiss me at the pool?!
Chick #2: Because I don’t want to have an open relationship with you! –Myrtle Beach, South Carolina

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beach http://beach.wpengine.com <![CDATA[The Suit Hurts and You're Abusive — This Is the Best S&M Club Ever]]> http://beach.wpengine.com/?p=674 2016-02-09T16:06:28Z 2016-02-09T16:06:28Z Japanese tourist #1 with wet suit on backwards: Hello!
Local surfer: You speak English?
Japanese tourist #2: Yes, yes!
Local surfer: Good. Get the fuck out of here! –The Hook, Santa Cruz, California Overheard by: Chrissy

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beach http://beach.wpengine.com <![CDATA[…According to That Al Gore Documentary.]]> http://beach.wpengine.com/?p=1715 2016-02-09T09:38:56Z 2016-02-09T09:38:56Z 10-year-old boy to younger brother: All mother nature gave you is a bag of shit. –North Padre, Texas

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