Overheard Editors: Is She One Of Us?

Little girl: Why is the ghost still here?
Dad: She just likes to come back and say hi from the spirit world.
Little girl: But why does she throw books?
Dad: She doesn't throw books, she just likes to read. And she's a little drunk.

--Hotel Del Coronado, San Diego, California


Posted 2010-01-27 EmailQuoteLinkDel.icio.us Facebook

Hopefully Only Sorrows Will Be Drowned Today.

Mother to five-year-old son: If anything happens get help from a lifeguard. Mommy's gonna be at the bar.

--Blizzard Beach, Disney World, Florida


Posted 2010-01-26 EmailQuoteLinkDel.icio.us Facebook

Such a Small Area, So Many Problems

20-something girl #1, coming out of water: Oh my god! I got stage fright, I couldn't go.
20-something girl #2: Oh, there's Danielle!! (points down to beach)
20-something girl #1: As soon as she gets here we're going back in, I have to pee so badly!
20-something girl #2: Hey, Danielle!
Danielle: Ohmigod, you guys! My herpes burns so badly!
(all three walks into water)

--Virginia Beach, Virginia

Overheard by: Sweedie


Posted 2010-01-25 EmailQuoteLinkDel.icio.us Facebook

...Though I Guess the Cow Also Works.

Girl, handing beach towel to gay guy: Here. This one's for you cuz it's got fruit on it.
Gay guy: Oh, I'm sorry. Where's the one with a bitch on it for you?

--Ocean City, Maryland

Overheard by: aoK


Posted 2010-01-23 EmailQuoteLinkDel.icio.us Facebook

You Still Need a Haircut

Loud gay man: Oh my gosh! Last time I saw you I was fucking your ass!

--Hillcrest, California

Overheard by: Brit-ta-nee


Posted 2010-01-22 EmailQuoteLinkDel.icio.us Facebook

Our SATs Have Tanning and Waxing Sections

High school girl #1: Wait, Muhammad Ali the boxer or the dictator?
High school girl #2: What planet do you come from where Muhammad Ali is a dictator?
High school girl #1: Florida.

--West Palm Beach, Florida


Posted 2010-01-21 EmailQuoteLinkDel.icio.us Facebook

Raise Your Hand If You're Sick Of Eminem

Sweaty dude on boardwalk: I wrote a poem the other day. Wanna hear it?
Sweaty female companion, jogging away: Aw, hell no!

--Tampa, Florida


Posted 2010-01-20 EmailQuoteLinkDel.icio.us Facebook

Teenage Girls: Encapsulated.

14-year-old girl to friends: Yeah, I'm not a whore... I'm just popular.

--Clearwater Beach, Florida


Posted 2010-01-19 EmailQuoteLinkDel.icio.us Facebook

Is It My Turn to Talk?

Old fisherman: Don't be tanglin' your lines up with mine, son!
Younger fisherman: You want a beer?
Old fisherman: I saw a UFO fly right under that bridge one time.
Younger fisherman: You need a haircut.

--Creaky Dock, Tampa, Florida

Overheard by: Sandy Paws


Posted 2010-01-18 EmailQuoteLinkDel.icio.us Facebook

You Should Stay Out Of Kraft Singles Bars

Woman #1: And I gave him the cheese. Then he said he'd kill me. And he told me exactly how he'd kill me.
Woman #2: That's horrible!

--Miami, Florida

Overheard by: ...what?


Posted 2010-01-16 EmailQuoteLinkDel.icio.us Facebook

A Metaphor for the Economy

Hobo: Happy holidays! Skate or die!

--Pacific Beach Boardwalk, San Diego, California

Overheard by: OB Dave


Posted 2010-01-15 EmailQuoteLinkDel.icio.us Facebook

I'd Hoped to Be Fat in My Own Way

Adorable little girl: Daddy, I want a hamburger!
Bitter dad: No, hamburgers will make you fat. Do you want to be fat like your mommy? Is that what you want?

--3rd Street Promenade, Santa Monica, California


Posted 2010-01-14 EmailQuoteLinkDel.icio.us Facebook