Little surfer kid pointing to large black lady: Look, a whale turd. –New Symrna, Florida
Black kid: Damn, I lost my pants.
Mom: Word? –Belmar, New Jersey
Girl #1: I think you might be ridiculous.
Girl #2: Look who’s talking.
Girl #1: See, you’re not normally ridiculous. On the other hand, I am always ridiculous. So why should you expect any different from me?
Girl #2: I shouldn’t. I’m sorry. –#6 Parking Lot, Jones Beach, New York
Young woman: I think Grandma’s looking down on us from heaven.
Old lady: I hear that’s a nice place.
Young woman: I’ve been there — it’s awesome! –Coney Island, New York Overheard by: Robin M.
Buff dude: Hey, sexy ladies, what’s up?
Girl #1: Not much, just out with my friend and our cat.
Buff dude: You have a cat on the beach?
Girl #2: Of course! People can bring their dogs, can’t they?
Buff dude: Hey, can I pet your pussy? –St. Petersburg Beach, Florida
Guy: See that dark area in the water slowly moving? It’s a school of fish
Girl: Wow, are you sure?
Guy: Yup — snapper.
Girl: Wow, that’s amazing. [Long pause] How come it’s now on the sand?
Guy: It could also be a cloud. –Point Pleasant Beach, New Jersey Overheard by: Rob Kemper
Thug #1: You goin’ in the water or you not?
Chick: I wanna go in the water, but I need yo’ shirt!
Thug #1: You’s like the Mexicans sayin’ they wanna cross the fence to get to the U.S. Just climb over it!
Thug #2: They cross the river! Them Mexicans turn cars into boats and float across! They must been watchin’ Monster Garage when they turned the VW Bug into a boat!
Thug #1: You not gettin’ my t-shirt — go in the water!
Chick, turning to Thug #1′s toddler son: Can I have your jersey? You have a shirt under it! I wanna go in the water!
Thug #2: That thing was sick. They turned that car into a boat and floated across! –Plum Island, Massachusetts Overheard by: Megan
Guy: My god, what is that?
Guy: This thing here. Medical waste is washing up on the shore.
Chick: What are you talking about?
Guy: Right there. It’s a breast implant.
Chick: It’s a jellyfish, you ninny.
Guy: … I wondered why there were so many. –Jersey Shore, New Jersey
Girl running along shore: Smoke weed every day!
Black lady on beach blanket: Hallelujah! Come here, baby! Girl runs to black lady, who stands and hugs her and kisses her. Black lady: Smoke weed, God bless you! –Seaside Heights, New Jersey Overheard by: t-money
Mother: Will you please stop whining?
Small boy: Shut up, Mommy. –Martell’s Tiki Bar, Point Pleasant Beach, New Jersey Overheard by: Trystan