Snorkel guide: The blue belt is for the strong swimmer. The orange belt is for… the weaker swimmer.
Man to wife: You better get the orange belt.
Wife: Hey, shut up!
–Jamaica
Overheard by: Peeto the Cheeto
Teen meathead #1: What are you?
Teen meathead #2: 100% Italian.
Teen meathead #1: Oh, really? That's mad cool.
Teen meathead #2: Yeah, but my brother is all different things–he's like Jewish and Irish and stuff.
–Lido Beach West, Long Island, New York
Overheard by: ally
Mom (exasperatedly): Come on children, you guys going to give me heart failure!
Six-year-old: You going to give yourself heart failure, cause you wouldn't leave us alone.
–Bridgetown, Barbados
- Posted on
- Caribbean, Comebacks, Health & Hygiene, Moms, Should've used a condom
Father pointing to ocean: Hey, John, look at the dolphins! [Seven-year-old boy looks around, not seeing them.] You’re missing them! You’re missing them like you miss everything! You’re just like your mother!
–Rehoboth Beach, Delaware
Overheard by: Got to remember that for when I am a parent
Lifeguard: What happened to your toenail?
Little boy: A monster carried it off a while ago. Around kindergarten, I think.
–Long Beach, California
Overheard by: Super Sexy Woman
- Posted on
- Body parts, California, Kids, Lifeguards, Questions, Weirdness
Drunk guy in line on cell: I don't see any rubbers here, so are you okay with “pull & pray?” (pause) You know I'm not gonna pull out, right?
–Dewey Beach, Delaware
Overheard by: I really hope they don't procreate…
- Posted on
- Delaware, Drunks, On the phone, Questions, Sex
Drunk guy in line on cell: I don't see any rubbers here, so are you okay with “pull & pray?” (pause) You know I'm not gonna pull out, right?
–Dewey Beach, Delaware
Overheard by: I really hope they don't procreate…
- Posted on
- Delaware, Drunks, On the phone, Questions, Sex
Crackhead: Yeah, I’m kind of known around here as the sheriff of the North Shore.
Local guy: Yeah? Well, then I’m the mayor.
Passing Australian surfer: I want to be prime minister.
–Sunset Beach, Oahu, Hawaii
Overheard by: Jehan
Girl #1: Dude, my retainer smells nasty!
Girl #2: Just put a little bleach on it.
Girl #1: Wouldn't that kill me?
Girl #2: Yeah, but it will make your teeth whiter.
–Tampa, Florida
- Posted on
- Body parts, Florida, Girls, Health & Hygiene, Questions, Sensory Experiences
