40-something guy: So, what do you do for a living?
Chick in bikini: Oh, I have a long list of things…
40-something guy: Stripper?
Chick in bikini, hardly offended: Do I look like I have the body of a stripper?
40-something guy: That’s why I asked.
–Palm Beach, Florida
- Posted on
- Assholes, Body parts, Florida, Insults
Little boy, floating on his back: Look at me! I’m the slowest boat in life!
–Valley Falls, Vernon, Connecticut
Overheard by: your parents must be so proud
- Posted on
- Connecticut, Kids, Swimming
Girl #1: What do you say when people ask about me?
Girl #2: “She's a narcissistic freak.”
Girl #1: What kind of narcissist am I?
Girl #2: (stares blankly)
Girl #1: A pretty oneee.
Girl #2: You want me to lie to you?
Girl #1: What?
Girl #2: Just kidding–you're not not pretty.
Girl #1: What?!
Girl #2: What?
Girl #1: You're saying I'm not ugly but I'm not pretty.
Girl #2: You're in limbo between pretty and ugly, so being mean to me makes you ugly.
–Kure Beach, North Carolina
Overheard by: Bee
- Posted on
- Compare and contrast, Girls, Lies, North Carolina, Physical Appearance, Psychology, Questions
British mother to young child: Either put it in your mouth or I'm giving it to charity!
–Miami Beach, Florida
Girl #1: So anyway, when me and Dale went shopping last night–
Girl #2: —No! ‘Dale and I’…
Girl #1: … No, you didn’t come.
–Hotel, Sydney, Australia
Teen boy: Let’s go back in the water since I have sand in my ass.
–San Clemente Beach, California
Overheard by: Wanted to kill this kid
Little black kid: Why can't we go in the pool?
Friend: What pool? That ain't no pool, nigga, it's got sharks in it!
–Coney Island Boardwalk, New York
Seven-year old boy: Those boys over there are looking at you.
Bronzed teen sister in bikini: Oh really? [Looks pleased.]Seven-year old boy: Yeah. I guess it’s cause you have that weird sunburn.
–Liberia, Costa Rica
- Posted on
- Central America, Girls, Guys, Kids, Physical Appearance, Sensory Experiences, Siblings, Sunbathing, Teens, Weirdness
